The Psychology of Unsubscribing

Nobody likes to see that unsubscribe notification pop up. But it's going to happen. The question isn't whether people will leave your list; it's why they leave, and what you can do about it before they get to that point.

Understanding why people unsubscribe is one of the most useful things a B2B business can do to improve its email marketing. It forces you to look at your newsletter through your reader's eyes.

It's not (usually) about you

Most people don't unsubscribe because they dislike you or your business. They unsubscribe because something shifted in them, in their business, or in what you're sending them.

The most common reasons people leave a list are:

Too many emails: This is the number one complaint.  In a B2B context, your readers are busy professionals.  Their inboxes are already overwhelming.  If your newsletter lands too often, or worse, if you add people to multiple lists, you'll be unsubscribed faster than you can say 'quarterly round-up'.

The content stopped being relevant: Maybe they signed up during a particular phase of their business and they've moved on.  Maybe you started out writing specifically for them and gradually drifted into content that feels more generic. Either way, relevance is everything.

You went quiet, then suddenly reappeared: This one surprises people.  Going silent for months and then landing in someone's inbox out of nowhere is jarring.  They've forgotten they signed up, they don't remember who you are, and the unsubscribe button is the logical response.

Too salesy, too often: There's nothing wrong with making an offer in a newsletter — in fact, you should.  But if every single email feels like a pitch, readers start to feel used rather than valued.

The emails just weren't very good: If your newsletter is dull, hard to read, or doesn't give the reader anything useful, they will eventually go.  They might not unsubscribe immediately – many people just stop opening – but they're already gone in spirit. 

The 'silent leaver' is more common than you think

This isn’t talked about enough: most disengaged readers don't actually unsubscribe. They just stop opening your emails.

In some ways, an unsubscribe is honest feedback.  The silent leavers – the ones sitting on your list with a zero open rate — are quietly distorting your data and costing you money if you're on a platform that charges by list size.

If you haven't done a list clean-up recently, it's worth running a re-engagement campaign.  Send a simple, direct email to anyone who hasn't opened in six months or more.  Ask them outright: do you still want to hear from us?  Give them an easy way to say yes — or to leave gracefully.  The ones who stay will be genuinely interested.  That's the list you want.

What you can actually do about it

The psychology of unsubscribing tells us something useful: people leave when the value runs out.  So the solution is not to make it harder to unsubscribe — that's both bad practice and bad manners — it's to make the value undeniable.

Be consistent.  Show up regularly so readers know what to expect from you and when.

Be specific.  The more clearly your newsletter serves a defined audience with defined challenges, the more likely those people are to stay.  A newsletter that tries to appeal to everyone usually appeals to no one.

Be honest about what you're sending.  If someone signs up for a weekly tip and starts receiving a daily digest, they'll feel misled.  Set expectations at sign-up and stick to them.

And finally — make it personal.  The newsletters that people keep coming back to are the ones that feel like they come from a human being, not a marketing department.  Your personality, your perspective, your experience — that's what keeps people subscribed.  

An unsubscribe is rarely a disaster.  Often it's just a list becoming more honest about itself.  The readers who stay are the ones who are genuinely interested in what you do — and those are exactly the people worth writing for.

How to influence the gossip

Reputation is all about gossip!

Your reputation is based on what other people say about you (usually when you’re not present). 

And what leads to those comments?

Their experience of you, your business, your content – and what they’ve heard about you from other people.  It’s like Chinese Whispers, one person says something and another repeats it to a different audience - and adds a bit.

That means that you need to watch every step you take, every move you make (thank you, Sting) because people are watching you.  Not as in stalking, but they notice if you are always late to meetings, or are inclined to put other people down.  They notice if you always turn up with sweet treats, or give away useful books, downloads, etc.  Everything you say and do has an impact on the ongoing gossip.

Many a reputation has struggled because of some chance remark.  “Oh, she’s so disorganised, always forgets to bring the right papers.”  The sad fact is that you may only have done this once, on a day when you had a row with your teenager before breakfast and the car had a flat tyre when you went to head out.  That just means that you have to ensure it doesn’t happen again (being disorganised – not teenagers and tyres, they’re just life).

Create a positive impression

The stats vary, depending on who did the poll and when, but overall it’s unfortunate that people tell around three times as many others about negative experiences as about good ones.  We expect a good level of service, so we don’t get excited when we get what we expect.  That means you need to be outstanding to get that positive gossip.

What could you that would make people remember you in a good way?

It has to go beyond simply following up promptly or sending information on time.  There needs to be something beyond that.

Think about things that have stuck in your mind when you’ve been on the receiving end of great service.

• The hotel that folded towels into animal shapes.
• The phone provider who gave you an extra charger, with a quirky message on the box ‘For your other mansion!’
• The garage that left a little ‘car hamper’ after your first service, with tissues, screen wipes, rubbish bags, a pen, some mints, etc.

It doesn’t have to be a gift, it can simply be doing something unexpected that is really helpful.

The key to success is consistency.  This is a long term marketing strategy, not a flash in the pan.  Keep doing the right things, being friendly, helpful and willing to go beyond the expectations and your reputation will shine bright.

It’s not about the numbers

 

I caught someone talking on Instagram recently and, while there was a good bit of swearing, he had a strong point.  Winning at social media isn’t about going viral, it isn’t about thousands (or even millions) of connections.  But that seems to be what everyone is chasing.

What is it that works?

Being authentic.

Being transparent.

And most importantly, being the expert that people immediately think of in your genre, in other words, an Authority.

Being successful isn’t about being everywhere and all things to all people.  You need to decide who you really want to talk to and then find out where they hang out and get involved.

Choose a platform, the one where your ideal clients are most active, and then be present, be visible and engage.

Social media isn’t a one way street and commenting genuinely on other people’s posts often gets you more noticed than your own posts!  Most platforms will tell you what time of day your followers are most active, so make some time in your diary to be live on the platform at that time and be visible.

This isn’t an opportunity to sales pitch everyone.  That’s the fastest way to turn people off.  You just need to be visible, helpful and engaged. 

Being interested is more important than being interesting.  There’s an old cliché, ‘People are interested in people who are interested in them’, and, while it is a cliché, that doesn’t mean it isn’t true!  So be interested - visibly.

What to post

Share you wisdom, but be you.  What are the biggest challenges your ideal clients face?  How could you help with that?  Share your wisdom and, if you have clients you’ve helped with the exact same problem, use their testimonial and results to underline what’s possible.

Personally, I hate making videos, but I find they get good engagement and they don’t have to be very long.  I often tell stories about how I learned key lessons in my skill area as well as sharing ‘how to’ information.

By all means be quirky – it attracts eyes.  On a recent LinkedIn masterclass (run by The HoLT, thank you Alex Thompson) the suggestion was to kick off with what you don’t do – the overall message was something like ‘Don’t ask me to fix your car, but I can fix your copy’, but in a longer form. 

There’s no rule that can be reliably applied, but try some different approaches.  Next week the algorithms will probably have changed again, but quality and authenticity will win out.